Canada

After my aunts sudden passing I decided that I needed to make the trip up to Canada and be with my family during this trying time in our lives. Though it was under heartbreaking circumstances, it was very special for me to be with my family so that we could all grieve together. The funeral was the saddest, and at the same time the most beautiful service. The spirit was so strong there, I'm sure my Aunt Laura would have been pleased. Here are some pictures from the trip. 

 Me and Lizzy Lou with our Asian pose.

 Brady Bear, aka Darth Vader. He is such a sweetheart!

 Saturday night we all went to Shaun and Dana's place. I don't think we have ever had a get together with cousins only, but it was a blast!

Me and Normy:)

It was extremely difficult for me to be away from Josh for four days. Especially because we could only communicate through text:( But I was so grateful to have the opportunity to spend with my family. I feel very blessed to have such amazing people in my life. 

Valentines Day

Josh and I don't make a huge deal out of Valentines Day. I honestly think its a little silly to spend a ridiculous amount of money to show someone you love them just one day out of the year. When you are truly in love Valentines should be celebrated everyday. A couple years ago Josh and I decided we would celebrate by writing each other love letters each year.

Yesterday we received some very unsettling news, my aunt suddenly passed away in her sleep. It was a complete shock and totally unexpected. It just goes to show we never know when I time on earth will be through. We should really live each day like its our last because it may be. So hold your sweetheart a little closer tonight, it just might be your last chance. I have a very difficult time with death. I understand that it is an essential part of the plan. But I just cant fathom how someone can be here one minute, and gone the next. I wonder if she knew what was going to happen. I wonder what she dreamed about that night. I wonder if she woke up at all before she returned to our Father in Heaven. So many unanswered questions. My heart and prayers go out to her family. Her husband, a now single father. Her children, the four people that she brought into this world. I can't imagine losing my mom. It seems so impossible. But nothing is impossible. I am just grateful that I have nothing but happy memories of my beautiful aunt. She was always so kind to me, always so fun to be around. She is and will forever be greatly missed.

Josh was so sweet to me after he heard the news, he made arrangements to take a personal day from work so that I wouldn't be home alone all night. For over an hour we snuggled on the love sac as I just sobbed trying to sort out the new reality. I'm sure this stuff happens everyday, but you never think it could happen to you. It didn't even happen to me, it happened to someone very close to me though. One of the reasons I take death so hard is because I am such an empathetic person. I feel the pain of those around me, and I put myself in their shoes. I never want my time with Josh to be through. Thanks to the gospel it never will be. It may be temporarily postponed, but we have Eternity together.

Believe in Yourself

Last week I attended Time Out For Women with my family. It was a very empowering experience. The presenters gave great speeches, and the performers sang beautiful songs. One of the songs specifically stuck out to me, and has been on my mind ever sense. Part of the chorus said something like "I believe in God, but I don't always believe in me" That is exactly the way I have been feeling lately, and it really brought me comfort to know that I am not the only one. I never doubt the fullness of blessings in the gospel but lately I have done nothing but doubt myself. I got to the point where looking in the mirror would make me cringe. Every time I got dressed in the morning looking down at my body made me sick. And then it hit me. If I do believe in God, and he created me, there is no reason for me not to believe in myself. I thought I was being honest with myself admitting that I don't like the way my face and my body look. But I was wrong. I was only doubting the creation that God made. To be honest, I need to get to the point where I feel comfortable in my own skin again. So for starters, I began working out. Going to the gym, practicing yoga and other strength training exercises. And let me tell you, I see a world of difference. It has only been a week but already I have increased energy and self esteem. Just knowing that I am working on improving myself, makes me feel like a stronger person. The other day when I was doing cardio at the gym, within the first 10 minutes I felt like I was going to buckle to the ground. So in order to keep going, I put a smile on my face, and for the next twenty minutes I silently cheered myself on, "You're doing so well!" "You can do this! Almost half way done!" "YES more than half way done!" "If I can do the first 20 minutes I can definitely do the next 10!" It sounded lame in my head, and writing it out just now, sounds even more lame! Haha, but I don't care because it worked. I made it through my full 30 minutes of cardio when I felt like quitting after the first 10. By believing in myself I know that I can do anything I set my mind to. I've been all about 'mind over matter' lately and it hasn't let me down yet. So even when you feel like giving up, don't let yourself down. Remember that you CAN overcome challenging things.

Reflections

Yesterday was the fourth anniversary of my grandpas death.

I feel like no matter what I write, it will not adequately describe my feelings of appreciation for this man being a part of my life. I will just do the best I can. 

He was such a sweet man, so in love with his family and the gospel. A real inspiration to everyone he knew. 

I was able to spend the day with my mom, and there was a certain reverence to our time together. We went to the cemetery to put flowers on his grave. We didn't stay long, but we shared precious moments. 

The emotion of the day caused me to reflect on my life's blessings. I have two amazing parents, three fun-loving brothers, and the best husband I could ever ask for. Here is an excerpt from a song entitled "For Good" These words speak truth about so many people in my life, friends, family, co workers. But today I want to dedicate these words to my grandpa.

'I've heard it said 

That people come into our lives for a reason

Bringing something we must learn

And we are led

To those who help us most to grow

If we let them

And we help them in return

Well, I don't know if I believe that's true

But I know I'm who I am today

Because I knew you....'

Things change, but the experiences we've had together are great.

Love you, miss you...

Creatively Crafty

Lately I have been on a crocheting kick, and it just so happens that a lot of babies have been coming into this world recently.

Meet Henry...

My friend Leah gave birth to this handsome man on January 11th. I wanted to contribute something special for him so I decided it would be nice to make him an Afgan. My mom is such an artist with her creations and over the years she has taught me some tricks of the trade when it comes to yarn and a hook. After several attempts of trial and error I finally figured out a pattern that I liked. I finished it on the plane ride to Florida, and gave it to Leah the next day. I was really pleased with the turn out and even happier when she sent me this picture:)

Sweet little Reagan..

While I was in Florida I started to crochet Reagan's Afgan. To make hers a little more feminine I added a ruffled border. I was really pleased with the end result and it looks like Reagan is too.

New Year, New Beginnings...

What's a better way to start the new year with new blog updates and pictures?

Josh came home from work a while back to find this picture perfect moment. His "three b's in bed" he likes to say. Me (britany) and Penny and Stella (the dogs). Female dogs. Also know as......b's... I am just glad I am in my own category of the b's and not with the dogs, at least I hope not:)

This is a typical night as we wait impatiently for Josh to come home from work. Stella is such a little diva. One of my unspoken new years resolutions was to figure out a way to make Stella not insist on sleeping on top of my pillow. As you can imagine, her wiener shaped body can take up my entire pillow. I recently started swiftly pulling the pillow out from under her and then burying her with the half of it that my head does not lay on. It's uncertain whether or not she finds this more comfortable, or she is just too lazy to crawl out from underneath the pillow and jump on top of it again. Either way, its much better for me:) Penny is a diva too but she is more obedient. She will cuddle with me as long as I will let her, and when I need my space she is more than understanding. Probably because she likes her space too, as you can tell from the picture. 

You may have noticed the pink blanket I have nestled up by my face. This was a gift from my great grandmother when I was born. I have slept with it ever sense I can remember and I still sleep with it to this day. Kinda silly I know, but don't judge me.  

HappyThankMasEveYear

Wow I have kind of been sucking at life. So much has happened sense I last posted. Lets start from the beginning.

Thanksgiving!
Josh's sister Kandise hosted Thanksgiving dinner for everyone. It was absolutely beautiful! Here are some of the pictures from that day.

We have been so blessed this year, we had so much to be thankful for. Most importantly we have our health, our families, and each other.

December 21st!

Josh's sister Sylvia gave birth to sweet baby Aiden.

 Proud uncle:)

My sister Nicole also gave birth that day, this is baby Reagan.

 Isn't she absolutely beautiful?! I am addicted to this little girl. 

December 23rd!
My moms family had their annual Christmas party where all of her siblings and cousins are invited. We always have so much fun together every year. Because Nicole was in the hospital Ryan got to hang out his grandma and grandpa, and his auntie Mii Mii. When we were driving to the Christmas party I snapped this picture of Brady and Ryan. They are best friends!

Little kids are so sweet, ESPECIALLY when they are asleep:)

December 24th!

Josh and I woke up bright and early and headed to the airport bound for Florida. My grandparents arranged for us to use a time share out in Redington Beach.  We spent a couple of days with one of my dearest friends, Leah. She got us tickets for Busch Gardens. We didn't get many pictures there, I kind of suck at taking pictures but here's what I've got...

 Monkeys

 Evolution? I think YES!

 Beautiful Scenery 

I think there are so monkeys back there somewhere. Monkeys are probably my favorite things to go see at the zoo. I just love the way they move around, the faces they make, and their cute mannerisms.

We had the pleasure of meeting with Josh's uncle John and his family. Josh hadn't seen him in 18 years! He has a beautiful family! We spent the day with them in Orlando and got to know him, his wife, and his kids. Later in the week they actually invited us out to their beach house. They were so gracious and kind as they hosted us. Again, I suck with pictures but here is what I was able to capture.

 For some reason this one turned out super blurry. But this is the Hannah Banana

 Aunt Julie, Uncle John, and the hilarious lil' Ava, me and Josh

 Julie, Sam, John, me, and Josh, and the dogs

This is the view from our balcony overlooking the river behind the beach house. Across the street on the opposite side is the Ocean.  Such a breath taking view.

We really enjoyed the time we were able to spend with our family. It was sad to say goodbye but now we have even more of a reason to visit the wonderful sunshine state!

I also had my first experience at ChuckE Cheese. We met up with the packer people, played some games, ate some food, and reminisced about good times. When I lived with them they only had two kids, Mekena and Kirra. Mekena remembers me living there and spent the whole afternoon asking me questions about what she was like when she was little. Kirra was too little to remember me living with them but has put the pieces together as I have visited them over the years. 

 Silly faces!

 I kind of look like a doofus in this picture but baby Kaia is SOOO sweet. The whole time I was holding her she was tickling my back, or caressing my hair. I loved it.

Tiffani, Reef, Kaia, me, Kirra, and Mekena

I can not believe how much Kirra and Mekena have grown up. It is so sweet spending time with them and the other Packer kids that I have come to know and love. Reef is so funny! He and Josh were connected at the hip at ChuckE Cheese, Reef would give him coins and ask, "do you want a turn?" when he was riding in the muscle car he was so happy and said, "wow! I want one of these for my birthday!!!" I hope he isn't too disappointed if he gets something else instead:) It was very hard to say goodbye to these little monsters! Mekena hugged me for so long and didn't want to let go. Kirra finally said, "Kena, get outta the way!!!" It was adorable. 

We were able to visit the Orlando Temple and do a session, prepare to be overloaded with pictures of the grounds. I probably took about fifty pictures, I figured I shouldn't post them all but I didn't do a good job at condensing them. 

 They still had the nativity scene set up so we had to get a picture of that!

 Josh playing in the water, typical boy...

 December 31st.

We woke up bright and early and headed to the airport ready to be home in our own beds. It felt like we traveled for days! Is it just me or does the trip home always seem longer than the trip to your destination? We went to my uncle Jeff's house for the annual New Years party. We only stayed until about 10:30 and I crashed as soon as we got home.

2011 brought us many adventures, challenges, and blessings. We expect no less adventures and challenges for 2012, and can only hope for the blessings again. Thank you so much to everybody who has been a part of our lives throughout the years. We are so lucky to have such great people surrounding us. 

October Catch Up

Wow, for the second year in a row October has completely consumed our lives to the point of me not updating the blog! Ok, so here we go, this month.....

Penny started obedience school at Petco. Penny is already a VERY obedient little girl but there are a few things we wanted to work on with her to improve our 'parenting' and her skills and behavior.

 I had to take some pictures to document her first day of school

 And one just wasn't enough...

Isn't she so cute in this sweater!? Josh of course would not let her go out like this. He is extremely against dressing dogs for the purpose of fashion.

We are already three weeks into the program and she is doing great. The trainer is very impressed with her skills and knowledge, no surprise to us tho:) 

October 29th was the annual Mark Family Halloween Party, hosted by the wonderful Aaron and Nicole. Our costume this year was inspired by a friend of mine....

I think it turned out perfectly:)

As always we had a blast at the party. Aaron always comes up with such fun and unique games for us to play, and Nicole's food NEVER disappoints. My nephews were also cute as a button!

October 30th Josh reached the ripe old age of 26. We had such a good day together! His mom, brother Joseph, sister Kandise, and nieces Kya, Pheobie, and Marlee all came over to celebrate with us. Those little girls are so much fun to have around. They are very sweet and cuddly with me, and very hyper and playful with Josh. It made me so happy that they came to share a special day with us. For dinner we headed to my parents house. A delicious roast was served to us followed by cheesecake for dessert. Can't beat that! We are truly blessed to have such loving family members.